How do you know if your significant other is “THE ONE?”

The other day, I was fortunate enough to speak to a group college students on the subject of relationships. During the Q&A portion of my presentation, I was asked the following question, “How do you know if your mate is the right one?”

To be perfectly frank, that question kind of stumped me. However, divine intervention interceded on my behalf and allowed me to answer the question this way.

Recently, I attended a seminar where the facilitator asked if we could write an entire story in six words or less. She stated that Ernest Hemingway was issued the same challenge and he answered it this way, “FOR SALE: Baby Shoes – Never Worn.”

I started thinking about what my story would be and visions of a Sir Mixalot song flashed through my mind.

So after I shared the Hemingway story, my answer to the young man that asked the question was, “I LIKE BIG BUTTS CANNOT LIE!” He and the rest of the audience burst into laughter. Then, I gave him as Paul Harvey would say, “the rest of the story.”

My wife and my youngest daughter happened to be in the audience and I gave the young man this analogy.

Like I said, “I like big butts.” However, if the best “booties” in the world (Beyonce, J-Lo, Shakira, Janet Jackson, etc.) were in this room and they all wanted me. I still would want to go home with the beautiful woman in the back. So if you feel the same way about the young lady that you are dating, you’ll know that she’s the one!

That was my suggestion for him. And, it is also my suggestion for you. If you are in a relationship and you want to know if the person that you are with is truly the one for you, ask yourself the following question.

“Would I be willing to exchange my relationship with this person for anything else in the world?”

If you can honestly answer no to the question, then there is a great chance that that person is Mr. or Mrs. Right!

Always be an ANT!

--Chuck Herring S+S = S*

*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RIDE THE BIG ROLLERCOASTER FIRST?

At one point in my life, I loved riding rollercoasters. The bigger, the badder, the loopier the better it was for me!

However, that love always caused me a problem. The problem was that as soon as I would get to the amusement park, my friends and I would "break our necks" to get to the gigantic ride. And after we would ride the death-defying "Magnum," "Thunderbolt," or "Phantom's Revenge," every other ride would seem anti-climactic. The rides seemed so pedestrian that all day I swear I could faintly hear B.B. King singing "The Thrill is Gone."

Later in life, around my mid-twenties, I developed a mild case of vertigo. So, my rollercoaster chasing days were over. But in that loss, I found something that gave me a greater thrill. The thrill not only moved my physical being but also moved my heart, soul and mind.

The thing I found was a new fascination with every aspect of life.

Today, I get bigger thrills from things like seeing a baby smile for the first time; fixing the clothes dryer on your own and it actually working properly; and watching my wife and children interact.

The "misfortune" of developing vertigo taught me one of life's most powerful lessons. The lesson is "life isn't about the number of breaths that you take, but the number of experiences that leave you breathless!"

--Chuck Herring S+S = S*
*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)

Creative Thoughts from an Insomniac

Hey guys,

I can't sleep. I think it's because I was watching CNN before I went to bed and the only thing the commentators talked about was the fear that average Americans have about our uncertain economy. That got me to thinking about why most people are afraid of things they have no control over while some people continue to have success no matter what is going on around them.

These are my thoughts.

The people that allow fear to overcome them allow their minds to controlled by Dream Killers. Here is what I mean by that:

I want you to go to any kindergarten classroom and ask the children what they want to be when they grow up. You'll hear the kids say things like, "I want to be a fireman ... a doctor ... a baseball player ... an actress, etc."

You'll never hear them say, "I want to work at the car wash ..."

Well, what happens to those dreams as they progress through school?

I'll tell you what happens: parents, schools, teachers, other kids, etc. They kill the dreams!

The same thing happens with your dreams.

Little by little, inch by inch, other people infect your dreams with their poison. They say things like,
"You'll never hit a curve ball."
"Medical School is too expensive."
"Being in movies doesn't happen to peple like us."
"You're not smart enough, or pretty enough, or don't have enough money, etc."

Now as an adult, most are still carrying the scars from the daggers that everyone cut them with to kill their dreams.

That's why most people don't believe that they can become successful. That's why YOU haven't started your own business; went back to school; found a different job or started a new career.

YOU ARE AFRAID THAT PEOPLE ARE GOING TO LAUGH AT YOU!

Let me tell you a secret. Don't worry about that because people are going to laugh at you regardless.

There are only two people worried about your bills - you and the people you owe.
So work on pleasing those 2 people and forget about everyone else!

If you are ready to accept the challenge of pursuing your dreams, please let me know. I will help you any way I can. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon. Remember, always be an ANT!!!

Sincerely,
Chuck Herring S+S = S*
*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)

THE ANT PRINCIPLE

How many of you used to be fascinated by bugs when you were a kid? Nowadays, they don’t hold much interest to me. But as a youngster, a jelly jar and a screwdriver to punch holes in the lid used to mean a new home for any crickets, lightning bugs, grasshoppers, or pill bugs, that crossed my path.

My favorite bugs of all-time were ants. Why ants? I used to play a game with ants like all little inquisitive boys called “Evil Forces of Nature!” Looking back on it, I don’t think that the ants really liked the fact that I would create tidal waves with cups of water or fry individual ants with a magnifying glass and sunlight.

I didn’t know it at the time. But, I would do all of that to watch how they worked to overcome devastating situations.

These observations have led me to believe that if you could take an ant’s mindset and put it into the mind of the leader of any organization, that organization will eventually become more productive, run more smoothly and have more satisfied workers and clients.
Here are some of the ant traits that are directly transferable to YOUR organization:

1) You cannot stop an ant without killing it! If you place an obstacle in front of an ant, it will go around; it will go over; it will go under or it will go through the object to reach its destination. Or, it will die trying!

Now, compare the ant to the pill bug. What happens when you create an obstacle for a pill bug? It doesn’t do what it takes to get to its destination. A pill bug just rolls into a ball (a pill) and allows life to have its way with it. Its prey can swallow it, a person can kick it or the wind can blow it into the next town. It doesn’t care. A pill bug just won’t fight back.
Humans may never know why some bugs fight with every ounce of spirit that they have while others fold up like a paper bag. All I know is that some fight and some don’t.

This is definitely true in the business world. Some companies are led by ants and some by pill
bugs.

CHRYSLER was on the verge of bankruptcy when they hired Lee Iacocca to become the CEO. Mr. Iacocca made all the right moves in the early ‘80’s that saved Chrysler from oblivion and as a side note made every “soccer mom” swoon with the invention of the minivan.

He was an ant in the truest sense of this definition. He saw an impossible situation and worked and searched until he found a way to overcome that obstacle.

2) Ants work together. They are always looking for the “second right answer.” What I mean is that you’ll never find one ant carrying a jellybean across the pond and the other ants standing by the lunch truck snickering under their collective breath about the “brown-nose” ant that is always trying to show the other ants up.

What you WILL see is that group of ants swimming across a pond with their legs locked and using their bodies to create an “Ant Bridge.” Now, that solo ant can carry the jellybean back to the colony.

What this shows is that ants participate in the Paretto Principle: The 80/20 Rule meaning that 80% of the work gets done 20% of the people. However in this scenario, every ant is a 20 percenter! Now guess who are the trivial many that make up the 80%? You got it – Pill Bugs!
Pill bugs won’t take any of the risks but want the rewards of the ants’ efforts. They will watch that same ant struggle to carry that jellybean all the way across the stream. Then once he gets it back home, they’ll be outside his door waiting for their “share” of the booty.

3) Ants know their role! Another trait that ants display that most businesses wish that their employees had is the ability to know their role. They know exactly where they fit into the organization. You would never see a “worker ant” doing a “soldier ants” job or a “scout ant” becoming the “queen ant.” Ant leaders don’t allow their people in their organizations to suffer from “Role Confusion.” Therefore, their colonies run like well-oiled machines

4) Ants are strategic. The thing most business leaders need to learn from ants is how to think about the winter in the summer.

There is a children’s story that I used to love called, “The Ant and The Grasshopper.” Some of you may remember it. It’s summertime and the ant is working to store food for the winter. The grasshopper comes along and tries to get the ant to stop working because it is a beautiful day and food is plentiful. The ant tells him that you have to prepare for trouble when times are good. The grasshopper doesn’t listen. When the brutal winter hits, the ant is sitting pretty and the grasshopper is about to starve to death.

That scenario happens to companies all the time. You see industry giants that were around twenty years ago that have “starved to death.” Companies like G.C. Murphy’s were industry leaders. Now, they are gone the way of the T-Rex. Why? Because, they thought summer would last forever and they didn’t make any provisions for the upcoming season of winter.
When you look at your business and your role within it, what kind of leader are you? When the winds of change are upon you, are you like the ant that sets its own sail to attack the unknown? Or, are you like the pill bug and will roll into a ball when the winds of change are blowing you into disaster? Those organizations that are not just surviving but that will thrive in the future, are those that will do “whatever it takes” to get the job done; that will work cooperatively with one another; that will trust others to do their own jobs and will plan for hard times during the good times.

--Chuck Herring S+S = S*
*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)

1440

Question: “What is it that we all have that is more valuable than gold, precious gems, real estate, etc. However, we give it away so freely that you would think it has no value?”

Answer: TIME

Remember, you can get more gold, gems and real estate. However when you SPEND one minute, that is one less minute that you will ever have. You can never get it back - ever!

Question: What does 24 times 60 equal?

Answer: 1440

You may be asking, “What does 1440 have to do with time?” For those of you who see the pattern, you know that 1440 is the number of minutes there are in a day.

Bill Gates is the wealthiest person on the planet. However even with his vast fortune, Bill cannot buy any more minutes. He has 1440 and YOU have 1440.

The difference between his 1440 and your 1440 is the financial wherewithal his 1440 brings to the marketplace. Nonetheless, we can potentially add enough value to our 1440 to match or even surpass the economic value in his.

TIME IS THE GREAT EQUALIZER!

Why is it then that we spend our most valuable asset in the wrong activities or with the wrong people?

I really don’t know. One of my mentors calls it a “Mystery of the Mind.”

What I do know though is that as professionals, we have to create a culture in our work environment that places time on the same level as money when considering the bottom line in our professional and personal lives.

Most savvy people carefully consider what to do with their money. We have budgets, forecasts, business plans, speculations, etc. We need to be just as diligent in how we spend our time.

Additionally, I believe that even more important than what we spend our time doing is who we spend our time with.

I’ve heard it said that, “you become the combined average of the five people with whom you spend the most time.”

That is the politically correct way of saying it! The way I really heard it is, “If you hang around nine broke people, you’ll be the tenth.” On the other hand if you spend your time with nine people that add value to the world, you’ll be the tenth as well.

Don’t think that I just mean money when I’m talking about value. What I also mean by value is to inspire and positively influence yourself and others.

One of the things I believe that everyone should do is follow the philosophies of the book, THE RICHEST MAN IN BABYLON by George Clason.

He says you should pay yourself 10%, give away 10%, invest 10% and live off of the other 70%. He was talking about money. But, what if we do the same thing with our time?

What would happen if we took 144 minutes (10%) a day and did something that was specifically for us and our families (family game night, date with your spouse, help your child with their homework, etc.)?

Then, what if we took that second 144 (10%) and volunteered in some way to help humanity (Big Brothers & Sisters, The Cancer Society, Habitat for Humanity, etc.)? Then, what if we invested the third 144 (10%) in becoming more mentally, physically and emotionally healthy (exercise, meditation, reading, etc.)? And finally, we worked, ate and slept in that last 70%.

Do you believe that the world would become a better place? Do you believe that people would live a more fulfilled life?

I have heard that knowledge is power. That’s only half-true. The application of knowledge is true power. Apply the above knowledge in your daily rituals and discover the power for creating a fulfilled life.

Thank you for your TIME!

--Chuck Herring (S+S = S)*
*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)

Inspiration at 35,000 Feet

Hey Guys,
Last Thursday, I was flying home to Pittsburgh from Texas. I made it home right before Hurricane Ike hit Houston. So, first of all, I want to offer my prayers of encouragement and support for all of the families on the Gulf Coast that are recovering from Ike’s aftermath.

On a much lighter note, as a disclaimer, I think I should tell you - I LOVE MUSICALS! Every since I saw the “Wizard of OZ,” the art of telling stories through song has captivated me and fed my imagination like no other form of entertainment.

Anyway, I was on the plane cruising at about 35,000 feet. When I glanced to my right, and saw a woman reading a magazine article about Julie Andrews. That triggered a chain of thoughts that took me back to the other day when my daughter, Imani, and I were watching “The Sound of Music.” One scene in particular shot to the forefront of my mind. It was the scene when Julie Andrew’s character, Maria, taught her “children” how to sing. She broke into the song “Do-Re-Mi” and one line from the song changed the way I believe success is achieved.

The lyric was, “When you know the notes to sing, you can sing most anything!” That twelve word phrase changed my perspective of the world.

Maria was right! The notes Do-Re-Mi-Fa-So-La-Ti are the building blocks for almost every song written.

Just like, every word in the English language is comprised of only twenty-six letters. And, every number that can be written is comprised of the digits 0 – 9.

Now, you are probably saying to yourself, “Soooo – why is he so excited about this stuff?”

My answer – WE ALL HAVE THE SAME BASIC MATERIALS TO WORK WITH!

However, what we do with them is totally up to us!

So when, someone gets something (the promotion, the position, the money, the girl, etc.) that you feel should be yours. Don’t get upset with them!

SHARPEN YOUR SKILLS!

Remember, we all have the same materials to work with!

Always be an ANT!
--Chuck Herring (S+S = S)*
*(Sweat + Sacrifice = SUCCESS)